avarielwings | (no subject)

(no subject)

I declare this post one of random spamming, from all of you.

Notifications are off, so comment until you hit the limit. About anything you want.

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There's this one 'toon where Bruce is protecting the baby, and so, of course, logically, he takes it out on patrol. Because the safest place is where he is. So he's kicking ass and taking names all over Gotham with a baby in his arms.

We need a Bruce in the Bar.

But I'm not sure how Steph'd react to that. I'd have to read all her canon over again. She and Bruce have the weirdest surrogate-father type relationship ever, f'real. He fires her! He tells her she's not good enough! She calls him a jerk! He takes her on for training again!

TOGETHER, THEY FIGHT CRIME.

..yeah, a Bruce inna bar would snap her wee little head in two, I think.

It'd be awesome, actually.

Yeah, so anyway, Bats is carrying this baby around on patrol and he stops some random group of teens from breaking into a store or something, and they're all "...baby."

And he's just "Yes."

And there're a few panels of fantastic "WTF" on their faces, and Bats looking ... Battish, and then one of the girls is like "You can't hold a baby that way!"

So they teach him how to look after it. I forget who the baby actually was, it wasn't an important one. Some foreign diplomats' kid in danger of being kidnapped. Or possibly had already been kidnapped.

Or Batnapped.

Batman does that sometimes.

Srsly, DC, crack. They retconned Jason's origin story recently. Originally, it went something like this: random street kid tries to steal Batmobile's tyres. Batman tells him no and takes him to a school to enrol him. School turns out to be run by crazy old lady who uses kids as her gang. There are paste jewels and wacky hi-jinx and Jason Saves The Day. And then Bats puts him inna car and says "Robin." And Jason goes "Robin?" And Bats says "Robin."

Needless to say, that was ... early eighties, I think. Don't even get me started on Pre-Crisis Jason vs Post-Crisis Jason. IT'S CRACK.

(Oooh, look, two Sandman icons inna row!)

Yeah, so, this recent retcon? Alfred comes down into the cave, and there's a kid. On a stool. TIED UP. GAGGED.

Batman is all "Oh, I found him stealing the tyres off the Batmobile, so I brought him back here."

Alfred goes 0_o and feeds him sandwiches.

And then they hire him as Robin.

And this? This was LAST YEAR.

Sometimes I wonder just what they're smoking in the DC editorial sessions.

"Hey, I've got an idea! Bondage and sandwiches!"
"Ahahaha oh man, totally! Who?"
"That other kid, the one nobody liked!"
"Jason! Him!"
"He's dead, man."
"Yeah. Cool. Let's do it!"

Doesn't make me love my canon any less, though. Srsly.

As you could possibly tell. Given that when you say "RANDOM SPAM" I oblige with, uh, crack.

I just got outta bed, it's not my fault.

Well, it is my fault, considering.

PS. ROBINS + SQUID ALSO = OTP.

... a non-comics icon! ...I'm slipping!

Second-last. *beam*

And last. Strangely appropriate.

d0wn_on_paper did the art for both these last two. You should totally check her journal out. She's awesome. And she's coming to stay with me for the comics con this weekend, 's gonna totally rock!

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